Why Goat Simulator is Awesome

“You’ve Goat to be kidding me…”

Do you have a fondness for destruction? Do you enjoy tormenting a peaceful town? Have you ever wondered what life would be like as a goat? If you answered ‘Yes’ to any of those questions, then Goat Simulator is the game for you!

Goat Simulator provides hours of entertainment as players travel around a small peaceful neighbourhood as a goat, doing all of the everyday activities that a goat would do. From ‘Baa’ing, running, jumping, to head-butting and kicking things, Goat Simulator offers it all… with a slight twist. For reasons unknown, the goat that players control seems to possess exceptional powers, such as the ability to never die, the ability to carry objects and people by simply licking them, and, of course, the ability to make a human sacrifice to the Blood Goat in order to receive demonic powers.


“Blood for the Blood Goat” 

Gameplay-wise, Goat Simulator is about causing as much damage as possible. The more destruction you cause, the more points you earn; and if you destroy things in a more stylish way, such as headbutting a bucket through a window, you’ll earn even more points!

Almost every object in Goat Simulator can be interacted with in some way, be it people, ventilation fans, vehicles, or even a gas station; if you can see it, you can almost definitely interact with it. Because so much of the map is interactive, players will stumble upon many entertaining little surprises, such as the altar of the Blood God, or the Giant Boulder of Death, or simply just the swimming pool.

Because such a huge percentage of the map is interactive, it can lead to some slight bugs, from getting stuck inside a wall, to endlessly falling through the world. However, the developers have stated that they are only fixing game-breaking bugs, and are leaving all the other bugs in the game in order to provide more opportunities for hilarious situations. The game is meant to be broken, it’s meant to be exploited; it’s entire design is aimed at keeping the player entertained even when things go horribly, horribly wrong.

While Goat Simulator doesn’t have an actual end, which means there’s no real “Winning” the game, there’s also no “losing” the game either. Your goat can’t die; and when the goat does inevitably stumble upon a bug that causes the player to fall through the world, there’s a handy little ‘Respawn’ option, allowing players to continue with their mayhem.

There are, however, a couple of issues that Goat Simulator could address in order to make the game even better. The game seems to have a fully rendered city visible in the distance, but players are unable to reach it, due to invisible walls. This means that everyone is limited to the small starting town; and while there are a lot of things to discover in the town, once the player has done everything, and discovered all the little easter eggs, there isn’t much left to keep them coming back.

As I’ve already said, there are a lot of things for players to discover while playing Goat Simulator, so I figured I would give you guys a few of my favourite features to try and find. Firstly, make a sacrifice to the Blood God in order to receive your demonic goat powers; it makes causing mayhem even easier. After that, declare yourself King (or Queen) of the goats, by finding the secret entrance to the Goat Castle. You’ll want to try and find as many of the small Golden Goat statues as possible; by doing so, you unlock “alternate” goats, such as the “Tall Goat” pictured below. The final thing that every player needs to discover and use at some point is the Jetpack. The jetpack can be extremely difficult to control, but if you manage to master it, you can make your way to anywhere in the town, such as the suspended container above the construction site.


“Unleash the power of the ‘Tall Goat’”

Of course, there are many other fun and surprising things to discover, and most people will discover them accidentally. With no time limit and no death, players will be able to throw themselves into seemingly stupid situations, and will almost definitely find yet another secret.


“Claim your rightful place as King (or Queen) of the goats!”

Overall, Goat Simulator is a great game, and provides players with hours of entertainment. With so much to interact with and destroy, there are bound to be secrets that still remain undiscovered. The sheer stupidity of the game, such as seeing a player using the “Tall Goat”, with the Jetpack, while having Demon Goat powers just flying across the map, can lead to endless entertainment. If you’re looking for a game to simply have fun, and waste an afternoon, Goat Simulator is perfect for you.

While the game is extremely fun, the fact that you’re limited to just the one town is quite disappointing.

Final Score: 7.5/10

This has been Evil Josh for The Awesome Update

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